Do NOT do this with your Elf on the Shelf

So if you missed the post on the family blog about our Elf named Percy, you can find it here.

Now that you've got the back story (and an understanding of what this silly thing is), here is what NOT to do with an Elf:
I was reading a rant on another blog about how stupid the elf on the shelf is and they included several pictures of what people do with their elves. They set them up to cook s'mores, drink pancake syrup, etc. Funny stuff.
Writing on your baby's head is not funny. Really. Has someone called child protective on this nutjob?