Idle Parenting

"Idle parenting means happy children"

That's the title of an article on parenting by an English author about how over-scheduling our kids does little to create self-reliance and independence. Letting kids be kids- and being a more hands-off parent is definitely food for thought. I found the entire concept interesting, and so I'm reposting portions of the Idle Parent's Manifesto here:

-We reject the idea that parenting requires hard work
-We reject the rampant cnosumerism that invades children from the moment they are born
-We drink alcohol without guilt-We lie in bed for as long as possible
-We try not to interfere
-Time is more important than money
-Happy mess is better than miserable tidiness
-We fill the house with music and laughter
-We don't waste money on family days out and holidays
-We both work as little as possible, especially when the kids are small

Happy kids, happy parents. Worth a shot, no?

I went through some recent pictures of the kids and found some examples of what we already do that fits this manifesto... and what might be taking these guidelines a bit too far.

#1- We wont' waste money on family days and holidays (in Brit speak- vacations)Well, we're not the best example of this one. Family vacations are a MUST in my book. Mark and I were just talking this weekend about the last time we went on vacation. It was for our honeymoon, three years ago. I am planning a vacation for the spring no matter how broke we are. I NEED TO FEEL MY TOES IN THE SAND.
As for "family days", I'm pretty bad at following that guideline too. We took the kids to the zoo on Friday. And I bought water park passes when we have Grandpa Jay's pool and a slip n' slide at home. Look how happy K is in grandma's arms at the pool. And again at the zoo, she's more interested in eating her toes than looking at the elephants. So I get the point.

I need to work on #1.

#2- We try not to interfereThis one is easy. In this picture Jacob is clearly stealing another little boy's truck at the playground. Me, being the idle parent, is allowing it. And the other boy's mother, also being idle, couldn't give a damn that her son is in tears at my son's blatant greed. Win-win situation.

And here again at our neighbor's home for a party the kids are getting a little crazy with the construction equipment. That's mulch from the garden all over the patio. The homeowner said "that's ok" so I sat back and enjoyed my wine cooler. That's a win for #2 and #3, which is... We drink alcohol without guilt.

I won't elaborate on that one. I don't need to. The English are awesome for putting that subject so eloquently into words. Well done, my friends across the pond, well done.

#4- We lie in bed for as long as possible

Lying in bed is a little difficult with a daughter that is nursing, but I'm proud (or is it embarrassed) to say that I've mastered the art of nursing while laying down. Sure, most of the time I end up falling asleep with my boobs hanging out, but I get that extra 20 minutes of sleep in the morning. Oh, and sometimes Jacob walks around the house half-naked.
#5- Happy mess...

By far my favorite guideline. Next to the drinking alcohol without guilt, of course.

Great guideline, but we might have to put some restrictions on this one too, as to not repeat pictures like the one below.
Overall, definitely guidelines we can live with. Happy kids, happy family.
Edit 7/12/10: I shared the guidelines with Mark. Apparently Idle Parenting is akin to letting your children be raised by a pack of wolves. We'll have to work on this. Stay tuned.