Watching People Watch You

For the last few years, every time I went out with the kids I was so focused on them (and what they were touching/pointing at/hitting) that I didn't notice anyone else. Now that they're older (and slightly more well-behaved... slightly) I've been people watching more frequently.

In all my people watching, I've found that people make the most curious expressions. And they're watching us.

I'm sure we do make quite the spectacle. As we make our way through Wegman's the kids start quietly enough (with their mouths full of free chocolate chip cookies). But by the time we're in the frozen food section it's complete chaos. My son is whining about why the 'car cart' was already taken, leaving him to sit in the front of the boring old cart, sitting under a pile of cereal boxes and frozen corn. My daughter devoured her little cookie twenty minutes ago and has now moved on to whatever she can get her hands on. She'll eat an apple while we shop. Or a green pepper. Or an onion.

And I have that frantic 'almost done!' look in my eyes as I head to the check-out lane. We certainly do make a funny picture, and it's no wonder people stare.

As I shopped the other day I began clumping these passerby into groups. They fall into a few categories:

The hipster. Dressed in her black leggings, oversized t-shirt and scarf, this young woman has a look of horror in her eyes. She's thinking about her freedom, meanwhile mentally reminding herself not to miss a birth control pill. Ever.

The other moms. Some have kids sitting perfectly in the cart, reading the shopping list and being very helpful. Others are hurrying through the store as quickly as possible trying to get the shopping done before her children grab all the sugary snacks off the shelves and add them to the cart. For the most part, we all give each other a quick nod of encouragement and keep going on our way.

The older men. They give the kids a quick pat on the head before giving me a crooked smile. When I was pregnant they would ask 'you know how you got that way, don't ya?' Now it's more like 'you know how you got them kids, don't ya?' Actually, yes, I do. And if I see that darn stork he's got some explaining to do.

The older women. After elbowing their husbands in the ribs for their inappropriate comment, they smile sympathetically. There's a sense of 'I've been there, you'll get through it too.' It's encouraging. Until they look into your cart and frown at the box of Lucky Charms. Don't worry, I don't let the kids eat sugary cereal. Those are for me.

The teenagers. This group is pretty much too engrossed by what's playing on their ipod to even look up and notice that there are other people in the store.

The cashiers. These poor kids. You can see the look of panic in their eyes the minute you roll your cart into their check-out lane. Although they are unfailingly polite (and never fail to give the kids a sticker), you can sense their relief when the last box of Cherios has been bagged and placed in your cart. Off you go, and thankfully all the gum and mints are still in their little boxes next to the conveyor belt. Mostly.

And then the shopping is done and we're on our way. When I was pregnant the cashiers would always ask if I wanted assistance taking my groceries to my car. I always declined. And I would now too, if I were asked. But I never have been. It's funny how we're treated with such reverence when we're carrying a child, and then looked at so funny when we have them in tow. It's a disconnect that has always amused me.

So, next time you see me in Wegmans, cut me some slack. I'm trying my best to shop for healthy food while keeping the distractions to fellow shoppers to a minimum. Just try not to judge me on that one box of Lucky Charms. They really are for me!